LESSON ONE (from my father): Whenever you buy a car (or motorbike), the only way to know when the oil was last changed is to change it yourself.
How I learned Lesson One: The fellow I'm buying the bike from says, "I just changed the oil; it should be good for about 3000km." Fast forward several weeks and oh, look! There's Jonathan on the side of the road with his Gorilla! Is that smoke?
The last conversation I had with the mechanic putting together a parts list that is taking DAYS to assemble went more or less like this: "It's not looking good buddy."
LESSON TWO (perhaps from my mother): Cooking with oil is dangerous. It can splatter and burn and even catch on fire.
How I learned Lesson Two: I love sweet potato fries. I love them so much I put "sweet potatoes" on my grocery list. You can imagine my delight when Bob came home with 10 lbs of sweet potatoes about a week ago. Now, to make sweet potato fries, you have to fry the sweet potatoes. To achieve this goal, I put a sauce pan on the burner, put in enough veggie oil to submerge my fries-to-be, and set my attention to cutting up a sweet potato. Fast forward several minutes. All done! Let's start putting them in my hot oil to cook! Remove the lid. Oops! I have an enormous fire on my hands! I know, I should put out the fire! What puts out fires? Hmm.... oh ya! Water!
WRONG!!!!!!
Those of you with some understanding of basic kitchen chemistry can predict what happened next. If not, imagine my terror when flames engulfed the cupboards over the sink, reached the ceiling, set ablaze the paper towel roll, and melted the tupperware sitting on the drying rack. I thought the light had somehow gone out, but no, it was just the smoke filling the studio.
Fortunately I emerged with only singed hair, eyebrows and eyelashes, and a few minor splatter burns on my hands and wrists. I was able to stay collected enough to douse the paper towels before anything really problematic caught fire. This weekend I will have the privilege of scrubbing the soot stained walls and ceiling, after which all will be forgiven.
These are the two lessons I learned this past week. The moral is obvious, but here it is: When you are taught something, please pay attention. There are reasons for things being the way they are. So boys and girls, whether its an engine or a kitchen you're dealing with, for goodness' sake...
Check. Your. Oil.
